My First Beer Mile

I was always reluctant of doing a beer mile because, although I am a decent runner, I am a horrible drinker and i don't like getting sick. I wasn't given the "two beer Bob" moniker for nothing. A beer mile is an event where you run four laps around a track drinking one can of beer before each lap. I wouldn't normally drink four beers in one night, let alone 4 in less than 15 minutes. My original plan was to run the mile, and drink 1/2 a can of beer before each lap. Once at the track with all he guys and gals, my adrenaline was flowing, and there was no way I could take the short cut. Our club rule is you need a beer with at least 5% alcohol content, but I brought Piels, which according to Jimmy Breslin, is a good drinking beer. but unfortunately, only contains 4.23% alcohol. I was sticking with it, but couldn't be in contention for he championship belt. That belt was currently held by Lindsay Hamoudi who ran a 6:53 last time out. Lindsay wasn't running so the belt was up for grabs.

Before

Chris Kelly joined me along with the RVRR runners and brought his wife Debbie and a few friends to cheer us on. There are a bunch of rules that you need to follow, and beer milers are very serious about them. No spillage or you are disqualified, no shotgunning and if you should vomit, you need to do a penalty lap. I was taking this "race" like my first marathon, enjoy the journey and just finish.

I haven't chugged a beer in years and now I needed to do four in less than 15 minutes, and oh by the way, run a mile.

You line you beers up past the finish line in a some sought of pattern that you can recognize so not to accidentally drink another competitors brew. Kelly was the official timer for the event so when she said go, we pulled the pop top and started drinking. The first one went down fairly easy and off I went. My stomach was a bit bloated, but I was fine. I was told by Chris that warm beer works best when chugging which mine was, although it was a chilly night. As I approached my second lap, I had a wee bit of apprehension of downing a second beer less that 2 minutes from my first. I took more time drinking it, but got it down in about a minute I guess. I was hoping to have split times but I totally forgot to click my watch. The second lap was fine but my bloated stomach was now a grumbling. Belching is important and according to some veterans of this event, get the air out as quickly as you can. Some guys or girls can't belch it out and it causes them a problem.

Second lap done and now beer number 3 was ready for me. I really took my time with this one, chatting with the dozen or so spectators. Some folks were vomiting and non competitors were hooting and hollering. I was having a blast, but I still had 1/2 the race to go. Once I consumed my third beer, it was off for lap number three. Some of the faster guys were now passing me as they were finishing up and I was trying to catch a few of the slower runners. One girl in front of me ran off the track to the infield and shouted back that we was feeling queasy again. I held back from passing her. I tried to pick up the pace, but my stomach began to act up a bit so I pulled it back to a 8:30 pace. There is a fine line between wanting to run and chug fast and making it through without having to do a penalty lap.

Lap three done and now it was beer #4 I had to contend with. I was pretty bloated at this point, but got it down. Dixon was being crowned the winner in a time of 8:22 with Keystone Ice's. I now just had to finish one lap without getting sick and I would have completed my first beer mile. I started off slowly and tried to pick it up but stomach was having none of it so I pulled back a bit. I was thinking of passing Kate but it wasn't worth it, being so close to the finish. I finished in a time of 14:30 being one of the last few to complete it. I really didn't care but I will only get better.

Once done, I was so proud of myself for finishing intact, no vomit and another running goal attained. Unlike my first marathon, which I vowed not to do again for awhile, I started planning my second beer mile attempt with hope of breaking 12 minutes. I guess my ultimate goal would be to go sub 10 minute, but that will be real tough. I would have to run a 7-8 minute mile and chug beers in 30 seconds which is not reasonable.